My favourite quotes from George Washington getting stressed over Georges Washington de Lafayette: A trilogy
(For context: At this time Washington could not offer sanctuary to Georges publically when he had arrived in America as it would run the risk of causing political friction – Lafayette was seen as a traitor to the French Revolution, and by accepting his son to stay with him, Washington would damage his neutral standing. So, instead, Georges stayed with the Hamiltons for the time being).
“Did my letter to young Fayette (under cover to you) get to hand in time to be presented to him, at the interview you had with him? My desire of seeing, and assuring him from my own mouth, of my fixed determination to be his friend & supporter, is such, that I hardly know how to reconcile to my feeling, the denial of permitting him to come hither for a few moments to receive it. But supposing that whatsoever you decide on will be for the best, I shall acquiesce therein.”
-To Alexander Hamilton from George Washington, 28 November 1795
“Have you seen or heard more of young Fayette since you last wrote to me on that subject? Where did he go to? Did you deliver him the letter I sent under cover to you for him? His case gives me pain, and I do not know how to get relieved from it. His sensibility I fear is hurt, by his not acknowledging the receipt of my letter to him; and yet, if considerations of a higher nature are opposed to a more uncovert countenance, it must be submitted to. If he wants money, I am ready to furnish it.”
-To Alexander Hamilton from George Washington, 22 December 1795
Ft Alexander Hamilton:
“Young La Fayette appears melancholy and has grown thin. A letter lately received from his mother which speaks of something which she wishes him to mention to you (as I learn from his preceptor) has quickened his sensibility and increased his regret. If I am satisfied that the present state of things is likely to occasion a durable gloom, endangering the health & in some sort the mind of the young man, I shall conclude, on the strength of former permission, to send him to you for a short visit—the rather as upon repeated reflection I am not able to convince myself that there is any real inconvenience in the step and as there are certainly delicate opposite sides. But it will be my endeavour to make him content to remain away.”
-From Alexander Hamilton to George Washington, 24 December 1795
“My mind being continually uneasy on Acct. of Young Fayette, I cannot but wish (if this letter should reach you in time, and no reasons stronger than what have occurred against it) that you would request him, and his Tuter, to come on to this place on a visit; without avowing, or making a mystery of the object—Leaving the rest to some after decision”
-To Alexander Hamilton from George Washington, 13 February 1796
Author: daintyfire
When your child says “Why can’t I get a puppy?”
Instead of defaulting to “My house, my rules”
Try “Any pet is a lot of responsibility. A puppy would have to be fed, walked, and taken outside to use the bathroom several times a day and taken for regular check-ups and vaccinations at the vet. You can’t do all of that by yourself, and I/we don’t have the time or money either.”
When your teenager says “Why can’t I come home at 2:00 this Saturday?”
Instead of defaulting to “My house, my rules!”
Try “The time you come home is a matter of respect and consideration. I/We will not only be concerned for your safety, but we would either be disturbed in the middle of the night when you arrive or forced to stay up for several extra hours waiting.”
When your child says “Why am I not allowed to do this thing?”
Instead of defaulting to “My house, my rules!”
Try actually communicating a legitimate reason, because children pick up on subtlety and on context and on the unspoken messages, and it’s better to teach children lessons like “You should think really hard before taking on new responsibilities” and “It’s important to show consideration for the needs of the people with whom you share a living space” than lessons like “It’s okay for people to demand your absolute obedience so long as you’re dependent on them for survival.”
TRUTH
Also worth knowing: training your child to accept arbitrary ‘reasons’ for obedience like ‘because I said so’ and ‘my house my rules’ etc trains them to be more susceptible to peer pressure because in their mind, when someone who is at all an authority (older than them, bigger than them, more impressive than them, more confident than them) demands something, they should accept it and not think about it critically.
Let them ask why, and give them a real reason. If not, don’t be surprised when they fall for lots of bullshit when they are older. You’re the one that made them believe ‘BECAUSE’ was reason enough.
Also, for children who are too stubborn or questioning to accept arbitrary answers like “because I said so,” your reply basically reads as “I don’t have a real reason.”
This is also dangerous because then they’ll assume this is true for all the other warnings you give, even important ones that are meant to keep them safe or protect them from abuse. They won’t think, “Oh, this is a bad idea because x y z,” they’ll think “My parent said not to do this but I bet there’s no real reason why, so I might as well do it anyway.”
I never obeyed my parents as a kid because they never took the time to give me legitimate reasons why I shouldn’t do things. It didn’t always turn out well for me. Talk honestly to your kids.
I ’m so tired of everyone’s drama with fandoms.
You all care more about lines on a paper than real humans.
Then y’all post memes about being lonely and having no friends .
Well….Bitch I wonder why?
This is my new fav picture.
The best part about this is that it’s completely plausible that it’s a totally casual thing. The Justice League has to crash in a hotel room together and share a bed. We already know Diana has no qualms about sharing her bed with men without any sexual connotation to it. And Batman and Superman are bros (usually depending on your preferred continuity), so this is basically just Superfriends cuddling in bed like it’s casual.
Guess wat, tumblr.
People have been writing “problematic” relationships since before Jesus learned to wipe his own ass.
So much of renaissance literature focuses on creepy incest pairings, fucked up assholes trying to claim a young girl’s virginity, women exchanging sexual favors for agency. One notable example: when John Ford published ‘Tis Pity She’s a Whore, the literature world reacted as though the play would tear the very moral fibers of society apart. He was, quite literally, called the trash man, and it was decided that the play would bring about the end of decent society.
Guess wat.
It didn’t.
The world went on. Literally no one walked away after reading Ford’s play and thought, “Well, that’s that. Better go impregnate my sister and kill anyone who gets in our way.” However, people did come away from the play wondering if society was too harsh in its condemnations of what makes a villain. It left people DISCOURSING, if we will, on the merits and levels of evil.
These themes are nothing new. They are not going to absurdly and suddenly “normalize” anything, because they never have. And, even better for our time than in Ford’s, as a society, we have become much more aware of how important it is to teach people about consent, about autonomy and agency, about safety. And it’s important that we keep teaching those lessons. But this does not mean we shun literature that explores anything negative. This does not mean we stop writing dynamics that explore Bad Things™ because, as history shows, it. won’t. destroy. society.
If you don’t enjoy a thing, then don’t read it. Don’t interact with it. Ignore it. If you are disgusted by a thing, don’t engage with it. If it makes you sick, or ill, or makes you clutch your pearls in alarm, do not read the thing. NO ONE IS FORCING YOU TO. And above all else, don’t you dare get on a high horse and try to gain some moral high ground by shaming the people who do read, write, and engage with such dynamics because
Guess wat.
It only encourages them to do it more.
Someone told Shakespeare that his penis puns were too bawdy.
So he went out of his way to add more.
Literature has always contained content that people did not like. There are always going to be ways to critique a work in a valid and rational way. Criticizing those who enjoy those works, and calling them “awful?” Not valid. Not rational. Not helpful. Not smart.
Daintyfire 